| So, I'm blogging at work right now. Probably not the best use of time at work, but it's just one of those days where I feel like I'm reading Chinese when I look at work stuff. For those of you who don't know, I can't read Chinese, so it's been a confusing hard-to-focus day. I'm ready to get out of here and head out to the gym and sweat it out a bit. Tonite is the night I'm taking my body back and going in for a tough workout. I'm also hoping that this will be a great way to help defeat this bastard sinus-infection I have. It's been lingering around for over a week now and causing me quite a bit of grief. The worst part is the constant pressure I feel in my face. I feel as if my head may explode at any given time! Not cool. Lately, I've been eating a lot better. I've been buying more Odwalla products. For a long time now I've been addicted to the Superfood and lately I've branched out to the fruit juices and protein drinks they have. They're great. I've also been shopping at Dominicks instead of Aldi's. Now don't get me wrong, there isn't a bigger Aldi-Nuthugger out there than me, but when it comes to meat and produce, there is a distinct quality difference between the two. Another thing that hit me the other day while shopping was this: "When I used to make a lot less money I always shopped at Dominick's." I decided that now that I make more money I could allow myself to shop there once again. But let me say this as well: "Things there are a lot more expensive than they used to be!" I'm adjusting, I spent about the same amount of money, got less things of course, but got better meat and fruits. Not to mention, the produce selection at Dominicks is just vastly better! Anyway, I will leave it where it is. I'm convinced that if I want to get serious about getting back into shape, then I need to eat higher quality foods. This is just a "next step" that I've taken. In other fronts, I feel like there is an even larger group of friends kind of leaving me behind. It's actually mutual, I'm leaving them behind quite a bit. I am just trying ever-so violently to pursue the dreams of my life and chase down the vision and plan for my life that God is unfolding. It's been good. It's helped me realize that I'm surrounded by a lot of people who are not looking to do the same. They're somewhat content with the status quo and for them that's great, for me, not so great. I don't often refer to myself as "driven" but it seems I'm becoming more and more driven these days. I am going to be setting some goals in the gym this week and shooting to attain them ahead of schedule. I'm not sure what to do about Grad School just yet. I'm not sure how much longer I'll be at EFCW. I sense God is preparing to give me release from there to pursue other things. I have been underneath a very heavy feeling that I'm in the wrong place to make the next step of my life. However, one of my dear friends encouraged me the other day when he wrote this: "Screw that. You’re in the right church alright. If they recognized the need for someone like yourself you wouldn’t have the huge task you do of challenging leadership and our structure to keep moving in the direction of people instead of program or event, and challenging EVERYBODY to step up, not just the “paid staff”. But I can see how that would be a difficult place to minister from. You are under the mountain, not on top. But someone’s got to do it. I’m glad its you and not me man." That quote pretty much brought me to tears. I often feel like no one really understands my heart and my vision but the email and this quote are affirmation that God has put someone in my life who understands where I'm at and where I'm going and it really humbled me big-time. I'm very thankful for that friend. He's a rock in my life. So, feels like life is kind of standing still a bit, but I'm sure it's just getting ready to change and move even more than I ever expected it. This Friday is Ignite. I have a 30-minute segment to prepare for. That's what I'll be doing after the gym tonite. I'm excited to workout and just move forward. (big sigh) Now I need to pack up and leave work. |
